I am a slow learner and I am proud of myself
Hi and Assalamualaikum peeps J
It’s me again, Farah.
I’ve been so motivated today don’t really know why that happened. This is very unusual. This article is focusing on slow learners out there. Yay, do not worry, because you and I (more out there) we share the same problems (or fate I can say). Be proud of yourselves because you worth more than you realized
I have another story today. It’s about myself. Do not really know how this would inspire you but I just want to share it and hoping that you find it beneficial. Here it goes!
This is a bit about myself, my inner side. I have quite a low self-confidence because I was really a big fat girl and I am a slow learner at the same time. A 2-in-1 package. In fact, I was the fattest in my classroom and also in school (maybe!). But that was me. I am a bit different person now. No longer with low self-confidence. I grew up and happy with myself. So, this is how I transformed!
2001-2006 (Sk Pusat Chabang Tiga)
When I was in primary school (since 7 until 12 y/o), I was afraid to involve in any sports because of my unusual size. I afraid I was not fit enough to run here and there. I did not join any sports or activity as far as I could remember. My bad! I ‘killed’ my childhood. I also did not perform well academically.
2007-2010 (Smka Sheikh Abdul Malek)
Move into my secondary school. The conditions were more or less the same. Nothing much changes. The most obvious things that have changed has I performed better academically. I was still a shy teenage girl, still bad physically, still did not participate in any sports and have not been selected in any organizations in school.
When I was 16, I was still in the same school before I decided to move out from that school into a prestigious boarding school. I think I need an inner makeover and be independent. So, moving out from the school and live with friends in school was my kickstart. Well, things did not start really well. Being isolated from friends and not to mentions, most of the teachers here hated me so much. A long unnecessary story, so I would not be bothered to mention it in details.
2010-2011 (Sesma)
I was in boarding school for 2 years. What I could learn from this boarding school were a lot. First, since I entered this school in the middle of the year, so I was a bit left behind by my classmates. The upcoming exam was about 3 weeks' time. I was left with 3 4 chapters for each subjects and I got 9 subjects to be covered. I ended up everyday crying in the bathroom and I felt afraid of the upcoming exam. I struggled and pushed myself to the fullest and I did not perform really well in the exam. I almost failed in Additional math subject (one of the hardest subject among 9). I got number 28 over 119 in ranks. Well, it was not that bad. My advice is, being self-knockout from my comfort zone really challenge my true self. I tried to express myself out. I always remind myself to get myself out from my comfort zone. Determination and perseverance are highly needed here. Do not worry if you happen to be n the same situation. Just go with it. Do not give your exam marks a d*mn. Live in the present. Keep pushing yourself and endure it yourself. Trust no one except yourself.
In the next exam (2 months later), I really really work hard (and smart). And I ended up got the highest in Additional Math and Biology and I managed to get number 3 over 119 in ranks. I really proud of myself. That was the first time I pushed myself to the fullest and it worth. My advice towards the readers is no matter how bad you were in the past, there must be room for improvements. There must be a way to improve and solve your problems. Ask help from your friends and relatives.
Here in this high school, I was one of the high achievers in school and in state, Terengganu. I managed to get 8A+ and 1A in my O-level. I ranked in the Top 30 in Terengganu in SPM 2011. I applied for scholarships however due to my low self-confidence, I failed to secure any scholarships. It's frustrating. I hate myself at the moment. I accepted wholeheartedly to pursue my studies in local university and finally I got an offer to get an offer to be a pharmacy foundation student in International Islamic University of Malaysia (IIUM). I lost my hope to pursue my studies abroad to be honest.
2012-2014 (CFS IIUM)
Moving into my foundation (A-level) years in IIUM. Well not really much things to be said here but I got 3.653 CGPA here. With Allah’s help, He made my path smooth to apply (for fun) the universities abroad, specifically in UK. At the same time, I applied the scholarships (for fun too!) under Ministry of Education MyBrainSc in 2014 when I was 20.
And Subhanallah, I got both university of Bristol placement in Biology school and scholarships. This is my dream, what I hope for all this while. Alhamdulillah thank you Allah. From this, I learned that we need to believe and have faith in ourselves and also have a non-stop pray to Allah asking from Him the best.
2014-2017 (University of Bristol, UK)
My first year in Bristol was not that bad. I struggled with English, which is my second language. Thank you Allah as He gave me such a nice friends like Jacob Mecoy, Eleanor Ralph, Luca Mariozzi, Alex Mandrut, Amylia Sahruzaini and Laura Howe who had helped me a lot. I managed to get a 2:1 results in my Year 1.
Move into my Year 2, it was really challenging. As I said before, I am a slow learner. Being a slow learner was pretty hard. Pretty hard to survive in Bristol and Biology. I always got low marks in continuous assessment (CA) and some of the CAs, I got the lowest. I did not perform really well in exams and I even failed in 1 unit. It was pretty hard to believe my eyes seeing the results. But nothing else can I do except to revise again and again the unit so that I can do well in it.
What I highlighted here is....
I am always left behind by my friends and studies constantly from 2001 to 2017. But I tried to improve myself. I did not have a very strong background. It is like, if a person able to hike return in 5 hours, I would do the same maybe in 9 hours. Do not give it a d*mn of the time. Just go. We are not here to fulfil people's timeline. We do have our own timeline to be fulfilled.
So, I conclude and share what I have learnt from my past experiences and probably you could apply it too.
1. Do not shy to seek for help from elders, friends and lecturers even if you use the broken English. No worries, they would not bash you.
2. Raise up your hand in lecture (to test your confidence level) and put some target. Let’s say, I always put the target, I need to raise up my hand, asking questions or answering the question uttered by lecturers AT LEAST ONCE PER SEMESTER. Reward yourself if you manage to meet your target.
3. Work smarter, not just work harder
4. Sleep less and not to waste your time just like that by watching movies, facebooking, Instagram). InshaAllah you will notice the ‘new’ you because you manage your time and work at its maximum
5. Be redha and leave the rest to Allah after you have tried your best in anything. Sometimes, I do some Nazar.hahha
6. Ask your moms (housewife especially) to recite Yasin when you are in the middle of exam so that Allah enlightens you while you answering the exam questions. There are sometimes ‘magical things’ happen.
7. Do some sadaqah to those in need. Or pay your friends the food J this is one of the ‘rezeki’ source.
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